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How To Buy A House And Not Get Divorced

Buying a house is one of the most stressful events in the lives of most Americans. It goes right up there with moving, marriage, death, and, yes, divorce, as we’ve seen at our online divorce review site over the years. Unless you have the money to pay for the house outright and not go through the loan process, then you’re going to get haggled and dumped on from so many different directions that it can cause a severe strain on your relationship.

The first time I bought a house when I was married, it ended in divorce. The struggle of holding our jobs together, packing boxes, getting an acceptance, and dotting all the financial i’s pushed us in opposite directions that we were too immature to recover from. We’d married young and weren’t prepared, and while the house itself wasn’t directly to blame for us getting divorced, it was certainly a massive trigger.

Fast forward 12 years and I’ve recently bought another house. Even though it’s still a miserable process, the woman I am with now was more ready for the task and so was I. Instead of crumbling under the pressure, we looked at the process as a team effort. We did this by:

Not expecting one of us to handle everything. Throughout the process, she’s asked me what I needed help on and she’s been reliable enough that I don’t have to second-guess her.

Understanding that sacrifices have to be made. We’re both not naive enough to think that because we didn’t get to spend as much quality time together, that in some way meant our marriage was suffering. Home buying is stressful, especially when you have to sandwich it in between taking care of a child, getting your work done, packing, and keeping a clean house.

Making a point to stay positive. Even though you can sometimes feel like giving up throughout the home buying process, it’s important to nip any negativity in the bud, because said negativity can linger long after the closing date, thus infecting your marriage. Just try to remember throughout this or any stressful process that “this too shall pass,” and it’s up to you both how it passes. We chose to think about how the furniture would be arranged, what we would do with that spare room, and which piece of furniture we would buy first once our account was built back up.

If you and your spouse have split for any reason — the stress of home buying, infidelity, irreconcilable differences — and you want out, then we recommend checking out our online divorce reviews for the best attorney referral and DIY forms services on the web. Good luck!

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