As on online divorce review site, we receive a lot of feedback from users who want to know how they can get out of alimony payments to their ex once the marriage is dissolved.

Alimony can seem unfair to the paying party. After all, you’re no longer in love with your ex. You pay child support, so the extra you’re paying to your spouse isn’t helping your little ones, right? Why don’t they just get a job?

These are the types of thoughts that go through the mind of the payor. However, courts award alimony for a reason that has nothing to do with trying to make your life miserable, even though it may seem that way at times.

Courts want to reach an equitable decision between the two parties, and like it or not, alimony is oftentimes just that. Do the systems for determining the amount need to be reformed? Probably. But the spirit behind the practice is justified especially when you see alimony through the eyes of the court instead of your own limited field of vision.

Here are the primary factors that courts weigh when determining alimony.

1. The length of time that your ex has been out of the workforce.

Like it or not, but when your ex has sacrificed his or her career to be a stay-at-home mom or homemaker, they are contributing to the marriage at a great personal risk. That contribution frees you up to advance your career and/or education, thus becoming more marketable. When the marriage is over, it’s not fair to simply discount those contributions. That’s why a judge will try to determine an equitable solution that allows the alimony recipient to continue with a similar lifestyle while pursuing personal opportunities. They’ve got a lot of lost ground to make up for, in other words, and alimony allows them to do it.

2. The barriers to working that your ex now faces.

If your ex is incapable in some way of improving their situation — a mental deficiency for instance — then it’s not unusual for a judge to award lifetime alimony. It is a safety net that is put there so that your ex’s quality of life won’t drop off considerably after the divorce. For disabled individuals, the barriers to reentering the workforce — or entering for the first time — can be too great to overcome without help. If you were making six figures per year while your ex took care of things at home enabling you to achieve that level of success, that will be a factor taken into consideration as well.

3. The fiscal demands of being the primary caregiver.

While child support goes to the child, your ex still needs to support said child financially, and if they are the primary caregiver, then it can be hard to do so when they are at a professional disadvantage. This, too, will be something courts look at in making a final determination.

If you’re looking for an attorney to help navigate the waters of alimony, check out some of our online divorce reviews of attorney referral services available in your area. Good luck!