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3 Second Marriage Success Tips

Historically, statistics have shown that second and third marriages are more likely to end in divorce than first marriages. But this is mostly because the parties involved don’t learn from their mistakes or pause to consider what they can do differently the second time around. To help you break the cycle if you’re dating someone new, we’ve put together a quick list of second marriage success tips. Here’s what you should consider before tying the knot again.

1. Healing comes first. 

The mistake many divorcees make is in moving on too quickly before they’ve had a chance to heal. Maybe it’s something they’re trying to prove to their ex as in, “Look at what you’re missing out on,” or maybe it’s something they’re trying to prove to themselves. Either way it’s a bad idea. The best course of action is to not even consider dating until you can look back on the divorce as a lesson learned rather than a tug that feels as if it is constantly tearing off the scabs before they’ve had a chance to heal.

2. Change yourself for the better, and you’ll change your ‘type’ for the better. 

Many people feel victimized because it seems they are constantly finding “the bad ones.” They try to portray this as bad luck when it is really about personal decision-making. If your new person reminds you too much of your ex or if you feel like everyone is ALWAYS bringing the drama to your door, that’s because you’re bringing a lot of it on yourself. By changing your attitude and influences, you will change your life for the better and that will change the type of person you attract. 

3. Be faster to forgive than engage.

One of the hallmarks of successful second marriages is that you learn it’s no longer about “winning” and “losing” when it comes to differences with your significant other. If you adopt a spirit of forgiveness and mercy and giving others the benefit of the doubt, then you will solve many of the problems that plagued your first relationship. Don’t engage in battle. It’s love, not warfare. 

Any veterans around who’ve done the second marriage thing and made it work? What helped you the most? Sound off in the comments section.

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