As an online divorce review site, we see many individuals contemplate and even act on divorce as a result of infidelity. It’s understandable why two people may not be able to work it out in just such a situation, but surprisingly, there are plenty of times where the marriage survives. The Redditors listed below share their reasons why they gave their unfaithful partners another shot. It’s not always pretty, but it does resonate.
1. “The first times, I stayed because I didn’t believe I could make it on my own. The last one I made him leave because I had realized I was worth more than the crumbs he was giving me. I showed my daughter what wasn’t acceptable to take from a man and my son what wasn’t acceptable to do to a woman.”
2. “My husband cheated on me emotionally four years ago. We weren’t married then — we had been dating for about a year. Four months before that, I had found nude pictures on his computer from some other girl. The first time, my world was shattered. One of the reasons I grew to love him as much as I did was because I never would’ve expected him to do anything like that. My trust was gone. I forgave him for the little mishap — I took it as remnants of his single life. Then, when I went away on a weekend trip, he had an overtly sexual conversation with a friend of his on Facebook. When I stumbled upon this, I was devastated. I can’t describe the hurt I felt. It was like someone had sucker punched me. I cried for days, weeks, months… and even now, four years later, I still cry.
“And yet, I stayed with him. When I confronted him about it, he broke down in tears, telling me he needed help, that he was so sorry and didn’t know why he did it. Seeing him in tears made me want to take care of him. I feel that’s why I stayed with him. I loved him, I didn’t want to throw it all away without giving it another try. Since then, I’ve never had any reason to believe he is still cheating on me. I honestly feel that it was a lapse in judgment on his part and that he realizes how deeply he hurt me. But that trust is no longer there, not completely.”
3. “Love is a difficult path, and unfortunately we don’t always grow at the same rate as our partners. I stayed and I’m glad I did. I still have moments of reflecting back to the hurt but I don’t want to live there. It was a habit for him and I recognize people do dumb things for even dumber reasons. He didn’t want to be the person he had become. I wanted a stab at a relationship that had amazing chemistry. And so far, it’s working. The biggest thing we’ve both learned is that you have to keep working on your relationship and not give up on each other. We will not allow boredom to set in with us, because we’ve both experienced unfulfillment in relationships before and that ended in us seeking fulfillment externally. That’s what happens, sometimes. We both intend for that not to happen to us. The only guarantee in life is that everything changes, but we are still hopeful.”
Remember, there is no dishonor in trying to work through and save your marriage from infidelity, just as there is no shame in leaving your spouse because of it. No one can make the right decision for you, BUT you. If your marriage is past the point of no return because of infidelity, then check out our online divorce reviews for how to proceed.