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Disagreements That Can Keep You From A DIY Divorce

dream cheatingAs a do-it-yourself divorce service, we see a lot of parties who are interested in filing on their own, but many end up having to go to court even though it isn’t their first preference. That’s because they don’t have an agreeable spouse and there is too much conflict to move forward. We’ve always said that DIY divorce is only for a certain type of couple: the kind who can treat the procedure as a business transaction rather than an emotional war. Today we thought we’d share a glimpse of what some of the disagreements are that so often derail this type of divorce.

First: Child Custody Agreements

According to our research, children are usually factors in around 52 percent of divorce cases. Most of the time, one parent is awarded primary custody while the other must pay child support as the non-custodial parent. In many cases, this doesn’t set well with the non-custodial party because they love their child and would rather be in a custodial role. The disagreement can lead to bitterness and courtroom drama, and it can place the child at the center of it all in a tug-of-war they’re not emotionally prepared for. Unfortunately, one or both parties are too blinded by revenge to consider what they’re doing to the child.

Secondly: Child Support

Other than simply wanting custody or wanting more visitation time, the non-custodial parent will often find themselves in the position of having to pay child support. This can create a two-sided conflict. For the non-custodial parent, it’s about paying more for less time spent with their child. For the custodial parent, it’s the perception of not receiving enough support to adequately cover childcare costs. Seeing eye-to-eye on these issues isn’t easy, and if the parents can’t agree, then lawyers will most likely be necessary.

Thirdly: Alimony

In many cases of divorce, one partner fights for alimony, or continued financial support from the second partner, even when children are not involved in the breakup. The construct is built on the idea that both partners sacrifice in a marriage. If one partner did not work outside the home, but instead gave up opportunities to stay at home and raise the children, this can win the sympathy of judges upon reaching a final decision. The payor, however, may see things differently, and may not be fond of the idea that they have to continue to support someone with whom they may no longer be able to stay in the same room as.

The decision to file for divorce is often plagued by conflict — the kind that can cost you time in a lawyer’s office and run up a hefty bill. DIY divorce is a better alternative, but make sure issues like those listed above can be resolved amicably before proceeding.

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