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The Male Perspective of Divorce

Divorce can be ugly and it doesn’t take Freud to unveil the facts. A married couple who at one point had the assumption that as life partners they would grow old together decide to go separate ways, there is resentment, hatred and a fury of mixed emotions which makes “irreconcilable differences” seem far too gentle of phrase. While there have been plenty of articles, blogs, websites, and LifeTime Network movies made for divorced women focused on handling depression and other negative effects of divorce; Hardly any attention gets shined on men’s reactions to divorce. examines the issue.

As of 2008 there was an estimate that close to 40% of marriages ended in divorce. The stats for second marriages are even less impressive. And while we are led to believe that most men are at fault for divorce for not showing enough affection at best and abuse at worst-no one disputes that divorce is hard on everyone. Most men can ponder what will happen in terms of child support and custody laws but once the ruling is made, most men can begrudgingly accepts it.

In general, men are defined by more than just their status in a marriage. A lifelong bachelor with a successful career never gets castigated of question yet an older woman in similar circumstances gets branded a spinster. A man who doesn’t want children isn’t looked at it in the same light as woman. A man can get judged by his job, his car, his hobbies and ironically men are effected more by employment status then marital status. If a man can pay the child support and have more time to golf-he probably isn’t going to think the divorce process a bad decision.

In stark contrast; men do not suffer the depression women do and tend to be far more impacted by employment status. Yet post divorce studies show an amazing statistic in that a woman’s standard of living drops by 73% while the man’s standard of living increases by 42%. It’s going to get a whole lot better soon. Probably a good thing that most men do not know this stat as I am sure many men on the marital fence would probably have visited yesterday. But once again; the pull of providing for spouse and children is a powerful and compelling reason to stay and given that men typically won’t research divorce law or child support laws there tends to be a blind eye cast to the subtle nuance of divorce law.

Lets examine it-a man gets divorced. Now what? He still has his job, friends, business associates and a social support system that he probably lamented not being able to spend more time with. Since Time and Memorium men have been raised to be the Hunters, Breadwinners, builders, police and fireman rolled into one; knowing the ins and outs of Divorce Law take a backseat to the needs of the family.

Studies show that men suffer disproportionate health effects on a far higher scale for employment factors then marital factors while the stats for woman are quite the opposite. The facts are no one looks eagerly towards divorce and very few men endure the divorce process unscathed. It is however time to admit that emotional factors and baggage due to divorce isn’t always solely reserved for women.

Negative Energy; Divorce’s Ugly ByProduct

Of all the emotions that can be rendered from the divorce process, Anger is truly the single most dangerous emotion that rears its ugly head when divorce is involved. Making matters all the more troubling is that when the process is over and considered a closing chapter in your life it is not uncommon that these two emotions though will last a great deal above and beyond what should have been the initial benchmark for closure.

Anger and resentment are natural responses to being emotionally damaged and are all too uncommon feelings that are experience and held onto during the divorce process. It is perfectly normal to feel some or all of these things when you have been hurt. These feelings may seem impossible to let go of, especially if issues of child custody and child support are concerned, but for a platitude of explanations but hanging on to them and letting those feeling linger and fester will only have an end result of long lasting negative effects on your mental and physical well-being and without question compromising your ability to start working towards rebuilding your life. The attitude of rebirth and a second chance to start with a better, more fulfilling life should never take a back seat to residual negativity.

Anger, resentment, guilt, and other negative emotions can slowly eat away away at the stability of your life in the following ways;
Anger is an energy that is draining and sadly the process of divorce and divorce laws can set up an overwhelmingly negative situation. That energy of anger robs you and depletes you of your positive power by transfering it to the person you are mad at. How much energy it takes to be mad at your ex? How much time and energy have you spent thinking and lingering over it? Time and Energy both have finite resources and no one has ever benefited by letting negative energy take over the positive and proactive abilities at your disposal.

An instinctive reaction to a grievance is resentment. Stemming and forming from the perception that you have been wronged or somehow being treated unfairly. Resentment can be defined as an inherent binding to bitterness and can be linked to the dangerous road toward outright hatred. These emotions can slowly and surely start to negatively impact the mind, body, and heart not to mention these two negative emotions of resent and anger are unquestionably socially destructive. Have friends stopped returning your calls or emails? It is probably not that they no longer want to be friends as much as it is that spending time with an angry, resentful person is unpleasant. We are not the first to realize that the fastest way to alienate others is to perpetuate yourself as one who cannot let go of the emotional baggage of anger and resentment. When someone who used to be known as “the fun friend” is now known as “the angry friend” you can expect luncheon invitations will start to decline. And while an online divorce kit can help start the divorce process we also recognize that factors of post divorce emotional well being.

In essence-do not lot divorce define your life and who you are. No matter how negative and emotionally draining the divorce process may have been letting it define you as a person is the surest way to limit your post divorce possibilities.

File For Divorce Online; An Idea Whose Time has Come


Back in the day, the idea of divorcing your spouse was a challenge and invariably lead to rumors or innuendos that one spouse must have committed some grounds of divorce as as unspeakable, unsavory or sordid act like committing adultery, spousal abuse or emotional abuse and utilize these as leverage on the assumption they would serve as ammo or the necessary needed proof that your spouse had acted improperly and thus be granted a divorce. Think about that-two adults who wished to make the split almost being forced to attack the other simply to earn the right of being freed of matrimony.

Fortunately, those days are behind us divorcing your spouse is much easier. Most couples can simply divorce sans courthouse using the downloadable divorce kit without the stigma and horror of having you and your family forced to ride the roller coaster of divorce court and the possibility of children having to listen to mom and dads lawyers making each of their parents out to be horrible people. With the theatrics and working knowledge of the courts and the divorce process some lawyers are very adept at stretching a court case out far longer then it other wise would need to be.

If there are children involved-avoiding the courtroom altogether is the best decision possible as it considers the feelings of children and avoids the high probability of humiliation and trauma of sitting and listening hearing about mom or dads worse personal traits paraded through the court.
All states nowadays allow for “no fault”, “no contest”, or uncontested divorce which essentially means that both spouses can agree on the terms of a divorce and amicably work out their own settlement. Considered in this process is the sorting out of assets and loans, cars and houses, child custody, alimony etc etc.

With the notion of a long term courtship or knowing your soul mate after 10 minutes becoming far less frequent- we have seen a distinct rise in couples who are either getting married far too young or simply getting married after a very short time after meeting. As much as we smirk and snicker at the idea of a downloadable divorce kit; A “no contest’” divorce also has the benefit in that a couple can simply decide to split without having to give a reason.

And without question in almost all instances an uncontested divorce kit will surely avoid attorneys, lawyers, and court rooms which also equates to a “no contest” divorce being far more cost effective. Basically seeing both spouses work out the details by themselves to the benefit off all parties involved in an adult, rational decision.

Physical Custody Issues with DIY Divorce

Physical custody section is made up of several activities and events all having do with the actual time lines in which each parent takes and acts as sole guardian of their children at a prearranged, predetermined date as agreed upon by the spouses.

Younger People are More Likely to Use Online Divorce Forms, Older People Handle Divorce Better

Older, more mature people are best to handle and adjust to the stress of divorce far better then their younger counterparts. Ironically, as a website that made its fame by selling online divorce kits and do-it-yourself divorce our target audience does tend to be a younger demographic.

MyDivorceDocuments; Divorce and Obesity

As anyone who has ever gone through a bitter Divorce and the divorce process can attest to its about as difficult of experience that anyone can go through.

MyDivorceDocuments Online Divorce Forms; Communication is key to amicable divorce

If it is one singular thing we hope you take away from visiting and reading our blog is that the worse possible thing a divorcing couple can do is fight like cats and dogs and get vindictive during the divorce process. If there are children involved the same rules applies and then some multiplied 500 times.

Gray Divorce; Divorce after 50


A recent story on MSNBC is revealing what has been long suspected but never considered when discussing the Divorce Process; The divorce rate for people over 50 has doubled over the last 20 years according to new research done by Bowling Green State University. More surprising is that the majority of these divorces are being brought forth and initiated by females. The phenomena known as the “gray divorce” is breaking traditional concepts an notions regarding marriage beliefs in a big way and for the reasons that, once scratched beneath the surface, are not only not too surprising but also makes us think its amazing this is happening as late as it did and how.

At first glance this news may seem shocking, one would tend to assume that if you have been married to the same spouse for over fifteen or twenty years the rest of the marriage is a lock and probably never in doubt as to the couples commitments to each other. But that also relies on the assumption that people are stagnant and do not change. There is undoubtedly no question of the abject absurdity of that notion. Before asking “How to get a Divorce” we must acknowledge that notion that people do in fact change, and if the routine of marriage starts to seem oppressive towards someone wanting to fulfill a dream, a hobby, an item on the bucket list etc etc….the gray divorce takes on more of a realistic, sensible realization.

For those moving up in years the idea of not settling for a mundane lifestyle and not going gently into that last goodnight as Dylan Thomas so eloquently wrote is a brave, but not surprising move.
With routine comes familiarity, and familiarity breeds contempt. And later in life once the children have left the nest, the question of child support and custody issues are not at a factor. Who hasnt as some point in there life asked the question of “Is that all there is?” or decided it was well worth the risk to see if the grass really is greener? Regardless the reasons, divorce after 50 will become more and more common. As one of the leading provider of online divorce forms, quite frankly we see a lot of additional reason to gray divorce then simply being tired of the routine or bored of a spouse.

For starters, the advent of the internet has revolutionized the way we gather information. Furthermore, the advances in this technology that have given more people internet access then ever before with the easiest platforms to use means that even those who are deathly afraid of technology can still do the most basic of Google searches. For the housewife in Washington who always dreamed of the Parisian night life of France, being able to research a trip, book a flight, find a friend on Facebook etc etc has never been easier much less the ease of Online Divorce Forms simplifying the process even further. Throw in the number of people who develop online relationships and seek advice from those who they have never personally met means getting opinion and advice is far more accessible.

For instance, telling someone to divorce their spouse and seek out lifes adventures is far more easy to dispense when you have never actually met the person you are dispensing advice to….much less their spouse. Talking and making grandiose plans to an internet friend can take on bold news steps in brevity when working with the assumption you will never actually meet the person who is taking your advice. It is much easier to tell someone to get California Divorce when you do not know them and actually live in Florida. There are conversations that would never take place with your neighbor or a co-worker. Like it or not, the internet and the way we gather information and can form and build interpersonal relationships is a huge factor for those divorcing later in life. Rather than lamenting these changes as a negative-these changes are really just examples and symptomatic of the age in which we live.

Do You Need A Lawyer For An Amicable Divorce?


Do You Need A Lawyer For An Amicable Divorce?

Not every divorce requires a lawyer; or complicated court processes. In fact, if both parties are in agreement about the terms, filing for divorce can be done with the right forms and downloadable divorce kits. While many people may feel a bit uneasy when it comes to dissolving a marriage without legal representation, more and more spouses are considering this option. Without sticky issues such as child custody and alimony, getting a Tennessee divorce is a relatively straightforward process. With the right online divorce forms, couples can quickly and easily end a marriage and move on with their lives without the need to endure complicated legal proceedings.

A Tennessee divorce lawyer is a valuable resource for marriages that are not ending peacefully, and sometimes a spouse needs an advocate to fight for their rights. However, if couples can manage to agree on how to end a marriage in a way that is satisfying for both parties, can help. Clients can access that can be filled out, notarized and submitted for processing without spending thousands of dollars for a lawyer to do the same thing. While not for everyone, anyone who is ending a marriage peacefully and willingly should consider this option.

Couples can also consider filling out the appropriate Tennessee divorce. Amicable divorces are generally easy to process and file, so having an experienced divorce lawyer review the paperwork is an affordable option to having them provide costly full-service representation. If you do not have complicated property, financial or child custody issues, you and your spouse can complete the appropriate Tennessee divorce forms and get the process underway as quickly and as inexpensively as possible.

Divorce does not have to be complicated if the parties involved can settle their differences without going to court. For those who are interested in this option,

has the necessary online divorce forms to initiate, process and complete a Tennessee divorce. Downloadable forms simply need to be printed out, completed by both parties and properly submitted. Anyone who wants to avoid the expensive and lengthy process of using attorneys to end a marriage can do it themselves. With the right information, paperwork and attitude, couples can peacefully walk away from a marriage and move on with their lives. While ending a marriage without an attorney is not for everyone, many couples in Tennessee are taking advantage of this affordable and fast option.

Crucial financial Tips when Entering the Post-Divorce World


Divorce is well known for the potential financial burden it can have on many people. A man and women join their lives together and also merge everything that comes along with it. Unfortunately this sometimes precarious situation can lead to a headache splitting situation. This can affect not only a family with children, relatives, and friends but their finances as well. In modern times it is important for both the man and the woman to protect themselves in these cases. Knowing the divorce processthe gec and procedures can help you prepare for the decisions and future financial situation you may find yourself in after the divorce is final.

It is important to plan your future financial situation out as you enter into the post divorce world. Even if you made the wide decision to use online divorce forms to file for divorce, the real financial battle may have just begun. Creating a budget and sticking to it can help relieve some of the worries and pressures that come with the divorce process. There are some common helpful ways to create a budget and stick to it during the beginning of your post divorce life.

Detail your expenses and income and plan your budget

This may apply to anyone but it is very important for newly divorced spouses with children to really take the time and assess your current and future financial situation. Understanding and keeping track of both your income, expenses, goals, and a realistic life styles can go a long way to better understanding your financial landscape post divorce.

Set extra funds aside for your children

This can be a daunting task, especially if you plan to send your child to college. It may seem futile given the change in your financial situation but there is never a better time to start. Starting with a simple savings plan can get you on the regular track in putting money aside for children. There are also many banking options to consider and getting advice from your bank can help give you the knowledge to make the right decision for your child’s future options.

Always make your payments on time

The debt problem in the US has been well documented for some time now. This tip may be important for you not matter if you’re recently divorced or not. Getting a handle on your current debt or the prevention of possible future debt is just as important as the income you have coming in. You may have recent support payments to make as well because of your divorce. Always make sure to pay any support payments or financial payments on time. Set up a reasonable payment plan whenever possible and resist putting off making regular installments.

Invest your savings when possible

Again this may seem like a futile effort just coming out of divorce, but there are many options for investment out there. Understanding investment opportunities can help you turn your savings into something more over time. Most people are not aware of the possibilities or options. Investing extra savings can become a great way to not only save money post divorce but help alleviate possible future financial hardship.

Entering into the post divorce world can be daunting. Socially and financially we make big changes in how we have become accustomed to living. Getting a grasp on your financial situation can be the first major step into creating a better future post divorce for you and your children